Of Sugar Highs and Emo Skies
by FullMetalCrayon
Summary: In which I give a demonstration of my lack of sanity. Complete crack dialogue that features most of the characters, complete with some toasters. C'mon, open me. OPEN MEEEEE  I'm a needy little document, aren't I?


Something my mind coughed up whilst having Writer's Block Flu.

Insanity. Complete Dialouge. Crack like none other.

Enjoy! Note: Swearing is beeped out with random noises. Don't even ask..

Trust me on this one. Also, everyone gets nicknames. See if you can figure it out xD

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>: "I am... THE BLONDE ALCHEMIST!"

**Al:** "No, brother, it's FULLMETAL."

**Ed: **"NO! I AM BLONDE; THERFORE I AM!"

**Mustang:** "I'm too sexy for my gloves, too sexy for my gloves, too sexy for.."

**Ed: **"Royboy, what the _(airhorn noise_)!"

**Roy: **"Erm Edward did you ingest an airhorn again?"

**Our favorite little Eddie: **"Whose asking?"

**Pyro-Man: ***facepalm* "Nevermind."

**Teh Short One: **"WIPE THAT (_airhorn noise)_ SMIRK OFF YOUR F _(airhorn nosie)_ING FACE, YOU _(cow mooing)!"_

*Edward, Roy, and Al look at the sky in an epic syncronised manner, cause the author said so.*

**Tin Can: **"OMG A FALLING PIG! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

**Blonde Antenna- Haver: **"Alphonse that's a kitten."

**Crazy-Cat Lover Armor..Person: **"REALLY OMG KITTEN WHERE CAN I EAT I- I mean...play with it like a normal little boy?"

**Red-Coat Wearer of Epicness:**"What the _(doorbell ringing)?"_

**Voice from the heavens**: "EDWARD F_(car horn_)ING ELRIC SHUT THE F(wind chimes) UP AND CLEAN OUT YOUR MOUTH, YOU LITTLE _(lizard peeing)_!"

**Chick Magnet: **"Wow, this mystical voice from the skyland regions really woke up on the wrong side of the bed!"

**Sky-Talker: **"Shut up, Roy."

**Mei**:"Hey Alphonse! Your kitten is smexy!"

**Young Metal One: **"Um, how did you get in there..?

**Mei Whose Voice Is Weird From Being Inside Alphonse: **"Oh I don't know." *poofs away*

**Genderless Random Voice: **"I HATE MY NONEXISTNG LIFE! I'LL NEVER MEET A GIRL!"

**Man With A Miniskirt Fetish: **"Aww, Mystical Voice. Don't be sad."

**Protoganist Shrimp: **"...Colonel what the _(screaming moose) _are you doing."

**Flame-ed One: **"Patting the depressed sky-voice, on the back, LE DUH!"

**Leather-Pants Boi:**"...That's my butt."

**Emo Sky-Being: **"That will not be mentioned! THIS IS A G RATED KIDS SHOW!" *and so, aforementioned awkward dialogue disappears into the void where unloved dialogue goes to perish.*

**Elevated Boot Wearer: **"Like _(ninja noise) _it is. This is Fullmetal Alchemist, Rated TV-14!~"

**I Make Smores Whenever I Like: **"I NEVER GET A SHOW ABOUT ME! WHYYYYYYYY!"

**Main Character in a Suit Of Armor That Isn't Loved Like Ed: **"Aw Colonel here, eat this kitten cake. It will fill you with ponies and rainbows~"

**Voice That No One Seems To Question:**"This is TOOOO a kids show! See!" *supposed children fall from the sky, hitting The Blonde Alchemist*

**Don't Call Me Short, I'll Rip Off Your Feet and Stick Them On Your Head: **"_(nails on a chalkboard) (ballerina toot) (shoe burp) (strangled seal) (Mr. Krabs) (therapist from authors other fic)"_

*cast faints from Ed's rainbowalishous vocabulary, then recovers cause the author got bored staring at unconcious people*

**Now Un-Emo Gleeful Voice:**"See! This is your audience!"

**Ally Ally Alphonse:**"...This is a Shamwow."

**Shamwow Loving Sky Voice: **"Ah, righto. Wrong switch."

*more objects fall from the sky*

**RoyBoy: **"...Toasters. Really?"

**Solf. J. Kimblee, The Pimp: **"I FREAKING LOVE TOASTERS!"

**The Little Person: **"Kimblee.? How'd you get out of prision?"

**Boom Goes the Child: **"Prision? I run a haberdashery.. *epic pause*

*pause*

*more pause*

"that sells ISHBALAN CHILDREN!"

*worldwide gasp*

"Hahaha no, I sell icecream."

**First Lieutenant Trigger-Happy:**"MY HEAD BLEW UP BECAUSE OF YOU!"

**Sky Voice That Knows All: **"Oh, hi Riza. And no, I'm pretty sure that was Scar."

**Do Your Paperwork: **"Oh, you mean the man who said he'd make me pretty enough for the Colonel?"

**Cast: **"..."

**Mr. Armstrong LuvsToSparkle: **"Hey since when were we in the desert?"

**Izumi Kick-Ur-Ass: **"I thought we were in Candyland."

**I Took A Picture Of Your Mom: **"No idiot we were at Kimblee's icecream store."

**The Almighty Voice: **"...Maes, we're in the mens restroom."

**Short Ranting Short One: **"I AM RHIANNA!"

**Little Brother/Kitty Mother:**"..But you're blonde."

**Alchemy Freak: **"I AM THE BLONDE ALCHEMIST!"

**Philospher's Stones Are YumYum: **"I LIKE TOASTERS!"

**Madame Christmas: **"I ENJOY GOLDEN SPORKS!"

**Yay For Flames: **"...Who are you?"

**Bar-Lady: **"YOUR MOM!"

**Set My Paperwork On Fire, Like a Boss: **"Pfft. Your a _(unicorn indigestion) _old lady."

**Envy The Envious: **"No..I'm a gender-confused apple tree."

**I Like Sparkly Steriods: **"Oh, okay. Nothing weird with a shapeshifting appletree."

**I'm Just A Housewife: **"Wait, what are we doing?"

**Colonel Bastard: **"Sitting in the mens restroom."

**Sky Voice That Hasn't Made An Appearance For A Bit: **"Actually no. You're dead, and this is your eternal punishment."

*Roy's screaming shakes a glass off the shelf above his desk, causing it to fall and smash his nuts, causing him to wake up rather abruptly*

_"Damn, I gotta lay off the pixie sticks."_

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><p>Righto ! Okay yes I misplaced my sanity.<p>

THEY ASKED ME WHAT I WOULD DO FOR A KLONDIKE BAR !

Anyway, I got bored to typing Ed: and Al: and Roy:...so I gave them all nicknames.

Please read and review!

Everytime you read and don't review...Mustang eats another pixie stick and Edward gets shorter.

PLEASE, THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

**~FullMetalCrayon, off to frolic in another land~**


End file.
